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How to Calm Your Fears of Public Speaking

At one point, I told everyone that I was very introverted and had a great fear of public speaking. This fear wasn't just a simple reluctance to speak in front of a group, I'm talking about a fear that clouded my mind and turned me into a talkative idiot. It could have been a wedding where I was the best man, a speech at school or a presentation at work…it didn't matter.

I know there are many people like this and although I don't know of a simple remedy, I have studied and practiced many things over the years.

I'm sure there are other great indicators out there, so if you have one, leave a comment below. No matter what I learn on this subject, there are still occasions when my face turns red and warms like the sun.

    • Notes:Many people will tell you not to read the notes because you're afraid you'll never look at the audience. While the perception (discussed later) of eye contact is important, having no sense is worse. Make a solid plan to follow using keywords you've practiced. While you clearly shouldn't just sit there reading a piece of paper, glancing at a blueprint is perfectly fine.
  • Contact lenses:For those who are shy, just don't look people in the face. What I mean by that is that while you have to look like you're looking into people's eyes, you don't have to. What I do is take a look at foreheads and haircuts; it is much less intimidating. As you do this, be sure to scan the entire room, looking right, left, and center. If you're in a small conference room, it's a little more difficult to manage, but the smaller audience should make up for some of your fear. In this case, I usually bite the bullet and look directly at people.

  • Homework:Forget what you want to say, your speech should be tailored to what the audience expects to hear. However, there is a way to accomplish both.

If your audience is waiting to know how many widgets your website has sold and you want to talk about how many servers you have and how they handled X number of pageviews, learn how to combine the facts to get your message across while the public hears what they want (ie:“Our 2 data centers equipped with XYZ processed 6 trillion page views resulting in 3 sales. Those 3 sales represented an 80% increase in revenue) . Doing this will eliminate the blank stares and boredom that often comes with listening to someone lecture/talk. As long as you can manage the merging of the public interest and your own, both sides get what they want.

  • Pause:When I first started speaking to large groups, my only goal was to finish the speech quickly while hoping the information stuck. It's not very smart. A better way is to provide information and then pause to allow the audience to absorb the information. All we're talking about is how long it takes you to take a sip of water (which I hope you brought to the podium or the boardroom).

  • Mumbler:Don't be a mumbler. I'm not saying you have to talk like Julius Caesar and make loud proclamations, but you have to speak with confidence. For those who are not confident, the only way to learn this is to practice. Get a digital recorder and recite your speech over and over until you know how it sounds best. When listening to the reading, put yourself in the audience's shoes and ask yourself if you would ever get bored listening to it. For this question, ask your spouse, girlfriend, whoever.

  • Um Factor:In the last point, I mentioned how using a recorder would help you gauge your sound quality. Well, keep the recorder handy because your task is to record your speech and listen to it for the sole purpose of counting the “ums”. You will be surprised and how often you say it. Saying “uh” is something you do naturally to give your brain time to catch up with your mouth and it sounds terrible. At my job, I have a Senior Manager from Something and he's brilliant, but he says 'uh' constantly during his speeches and it makes him sound, well, less smart.

  • Anticipate:As we mentioned, people come to listen to you because they value your opinion on a particular topic. However, if your speech allows questions to be posed to the audience, there is a little unknown element for you. I usually try to anticipate what questions the audience will have and then have a separate note sheet for those answers. If I don't know an answer, I'll admit it immediately and ask that we take this topic offline. This gives me time to bring in a subject matter expert to answer the person's question without sidetracking me.

  • Show up early:This one might not do anything for you, but I'm a control freak and this helps. I arrive at the scene early and take a look around.
  • Where will I be standing?
  • Do I have a wireless mic so I can walk on stage or am I stuck on a podium?
  • Where will my presentation be viewed?

The more I know in advance, the less chance there is that something will take me off track.

  • Stick to the Plan:This one is harder than you think. As you talk and follow your plan, an idea will inevitably come to mind. Your idea will insist that you step off track and talk about something you didn't plan on. Unless you're totally comfortable up there, resist the urge.

  • Practice:We've already mentioned a few times that listening to yourself speak on a recorder can help reduce ums and prevent mumbling. It also helps in measuring transition and throughput. In a separate session from your um detection, listen to how you move from point to point. These transitions should be gradual rather than suddenly and completely changing direction. The sudden changes are similar to holding up a stop sign at the audience because their brain is trying to shut down and process what just happened. At some point, they won't be able to catch up.

  • Coffee:That last one was something my Dad taught me a long time ago. If you must drink coffee to have the energy to carry on your speech, be sure to wash it down with water. For him (and me), coffee dries out your mouth and makes it very difficult to talk for a long time. Also, and I mentioned this before, be sure to bring water with you. In addition to getting rid of any lingering cotton wool, you'll be able to incorporate the little delays we mentioned.

As I mentioned, these are the little things that I used to soothe my fear of speaking. Over time, the need to use all the tools diminished simply because I got more comfortable in front of groups. However, a few stay with me no matter what.

-Jay