Family Encyclopedia >> Work

This is how you deal with a frenemy at work

When you have frenemies in your life it can be really annoying, but when you work with them it can be downright difficult. Having a love-hate relationship with a coworker is easier said than done. So what can you do to make working with a frenemy bearable? Here are five ways to deal with frenemies at work.

Keep your ideas to yourself
A frenemy could steal your ideas and give themselves credit, so it's not wise to share your ideas with such a person until the moment is right. Present your ideas in a meeting or just to your boss and with no one else. Even sharing your ideas with someone you think is a friend can backfire. So be careful what you share.

Don't gossip
Keep your opinion about your frenemia to yourself. Spreading gossip about someone will only lead to trouble, be it physical, social or emotional, and it can have serious consequences depending on how the gossip is perceived and by whom. So don't do it. It's not worth it.
 
Don't make it worse You can throw oil on the fire in different ways. Gossip, as mentioned above, can make the situation worse. Competition can be a good thing because it can help you improve, but it can also be very destructive when it gets out of hand. Losing your temper when a conflict arises can come back to you. Words spoken in anger often cannot be taken back. Taking revenge is also another way to make things worse. If your frenemia does this, don't do it back. It will never stop if you two keep going every time there is a problem.

Look at yourself
Take a look at yourself and see if there is anything you are doing that could potentially increase the problem. What can you do to improve your behavior with your frenemy? Perhaps you will see that if you change your behavior you could have a relationship that is not about competition or destroying each other.

Be professional
As always, treat yourself in a professional manner. If you choose to confront your frenemy, do so in private rather than in front of others. Be kind with your words or say nothing at all. When it comes down to it, walk away or avoid frenemy to avoid further problems. You are in control of how you approach your work frenemy. Making sure your behavior doesn't complicate things makes working with a frenemy much more bearable and enjoyable.